Third Time Lucky...

I couldn't think of a better title and it's my third post. Not in the same day, but in the same 24 hours, so...

Moving on. I'm wide awake. My sleeping pattern is screwed up. Big time. Oh well, life has it's little problems. Just have to deal with them, yeah? So, as you are more than likely aware, it's the Easter Holidays. I hope you had fun stuffing your faces with chocolate. Me? I highly regret it. I think I'm going off chocolate *cue gasp from those who know me very well* Yes, it's true and not an April Fools, either. It's for the best really.

Do you ever get that feeling where you really want to write but haven't a clue what to actually talk about? I have that right now. Well, I get it like 85% of the time. It's highly irritating, but another one of life's little problems. To be honest, I can't quite remember what got me into writing. Ever since primary I've been praised for what I write, but I have no clue what got me into liking it so much. I suppose it could be because I can explain myself slightly better than when talking to people, because communicating vocally, I am shite. No idea why. Another reason could be because I despise maths so much and writing has so much more freedom than maths. I mean 5 times 5 will always equal 25 whether you like it or not, but writing... it can open so many doors, it can mean so many things. I love typing more than writing by hand because my handwriting is awful and holding a pen tends to give me a lot of hand cramp. Also, my mind tends to think so quickly when it comes to writing and my hands on a keyboard can catch up with my brain, whereas when writing with a pen, my hand is way behind. My brain has finished two pages and I'm still writing the first half of the first page... not good.

Ah, I write so much gibberish, especially at night. I will never understand my brain. Apparently, though, that what makes me creative. My imagination is so wild and unusual that even I don't understand it. They say (they as in my parents,etc.) if I use it wisely, I could achieve great things. But, I'm not wise. So that's me stuck then. My brain can be my best friend (not literally) on times and worst enemy on other times. It can come up with so many ideas and things I want to do in life, but then it can bring so much negativity and bring me down so much. I'd like to do a study on a bi polar/cyclothymic persons mind, but I'm too lazy and have other things I have to get on with and I'm just not smart enough anyway. And if it involves Science, you can forget it. I've got half an assignment to do before I finish Science forever! The only thing I love about BTEC Science is there's no exams at the end of it. Sweet or what?

GCSE's. The exams that every year 11 pupil has to take compulsory. Qualifications. Big time scare. For most people, anyway. I'm probably like one of the only teenagers in the UK who isn't too scared of the exams. Of course, I'm a bit stressed and I am anxious to know what grades I'll achieve, but the thing is, the college course I will be taking doesn't need GCSE's. The only two reasons I am completing the exams is because 1. they are compulsory and 2. future career. If I were rich, I'd dump them. I'd do other qualifications. Though, if I were rich, I wouldn't be jobless. No, I'd have to keep busy. I'd still stick with CLIC and Wicid and that's a promise. I'd have some sort of job but more than likely a job I really want because if I were very rich, I would own the company/organization/insert-other-type-of-business-here that I work for.

I do worry about the future. A lot, in fact. I mean, I've only now figured out what I'm doing after year 11. But what do I do after the 1-2 year college course I am taking is complete? Do I enroll on another course? Do I find a job? What? What do I do? And not just career wise, but what about family? When do I move out from home? I would like a flat of my own when I'm older, but my mother and I are so close, I can't imagine me living away from her. I shouldn't worry as much as I do, but I just can't help it.

Right, I think I've bored you enough for one night. If you made it this far, anyway.

Norning! [that's my word for Goodnight/morning. You see it's past 12am but not exactly classed as morning... you'll catch on...] x